PAIN TRAIN TOUR 2009

The pain train has departed and is moving south at full speed. Rail cars are heavy laden with the most explosive recipe of 2009.

Next Stop: 27 Edgar Street

The pain train is rolling into the New Year... All aboard!

AS THE YEAR COMES TO AN END

warm up
5 min dbl under test, max reps

bench press
10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1

135# snatch x 30

Not for time! BUT do watch the clock. Look for trends and patterns. Experiment with more and less rest. Speed up and slow down. Note the quantity of missed reps. Observe the relationship between form and fatigue. Find what works.

REST, BRAINSTORM, PLAN, DECIDE, AND EXECUTE

THE K-BELL MILE

200 mtr intervals, 26kg bell:
walking R k-bell swings
waiter's carry
farmer's carry
k-bell throws
8 rnds for time

REST

No lubrication in the joints, no fuel in the tank, no one manning the controls, no tread left on the tires, no more juice in the juicer. The muscles are full of rust, petrified, dormant, and cautious of any suggestions. The mind is drifting in and out of consciousness, unable to concentrate, wondering, worried, and lethargic. Is 48 hours enough time to completely refresh, energize, and get ready for a new cycle of pain and suffering or have I inflicted 72 hours of pain? Is one day off enough? Do I deserve rest, need rest, want rest? Am I getting more or less fit by resting? Am I overtraining? Working backward, forward, or upsidedown? Should I be doing more or less? Am I eating enough? Should I boost my calories? Is it possible that I'm training outside of my normal zone and need to compensate? More sleep, more food, acupuncture, massage, astrology? What do I need, if anything?

Christ Mass Destruction

315# d-lift x 15
pull ups x 20
225# front squats x 10
ring dips x 20
225# jerk x 5
pull ups x 20
225# back squats x 10
ring dips x 20
315# d-lift x 15

CHRISTMAS EVIL

135# thrusters/muscle ups
21/7, 15/5, 9/3
for time

REST

If you prepare for the worst then you'll always be ready unless the worst for which you prepare isn't really bad at all. Where does this leave us?

30-25-20
rest 2 min between intervals; subtract 4 min from total time
pull ups
k-bell swings (36kg A or 97# R)
ring dips
rythm ropes
sledge hammers
sit ups
24" box jumps
push ups

BJJ

There will be a special stop made by the pain train tomorrow. Who's getting on? 

35# k-bell bench press x 100
each break penalized by one caving ladder climb

Where you are lacking in weight you can make up for in creativity. More weight doesn't always mean more difficult.

NOTHING STOPS ME

THE CALM BEFORE THE SNOW

225# clean and jerk

18x for time

rest 5 min

max number of rope climbs in 3 min

REST

The Vestiges of the Warrior Soul
In a world that requires virtually zero effort to maintain life it's truly a wonder that every now and again we meet someone who shares our vision, our energy, our passion, and our drive for self-improvement and world domination; vuala, this community. In a caveman-like world we would generally consider such a person a threat but in a world full of popcorn and chewed up bubblegum our competition has become our ally. In a world so replete with potential enemies it is imperative that strength beget strength; that alliance overcome the collusion of mediocrity; that insurrection by the poor and timid souls whose weak and petty voice carries a pathetic tune be crushed by the bellow of the strong. The parasitic weakness that surrounds us, that is shoved down our throat by industry, deafens our ears by media, and blinds our eyes; the pure disbelief of madness need no longer be entertained by our senses. The warriors we meet in the gym, on the street, in cyberspace, and whereever else their restless souls wonder should/must embrace, bond, solidify, and claim their own piece of the prize. This is the person with whom I want to work, share my personal time, entrust with my posessions, and invite into to my life. We should be able to trace our lineage to some victory; hence, our existence and our right to exploit it. We can, with confidence, purport to succeed at whatever we do regardless of how menial or magnificant the task. We aren't here to "get in shape." This is nothing more than a medium for expression, a manifestion of our energy, an objection to life's lounge chair, a declaration that we prefer a bed of nails than the entitlement to comfort, the robber of ambition, and the maker of the softest of today's man. The race for gain has cajoled the human soul. There is a disease of softness, lethargy, passive resignation, and utter refusal to move. Every burst of energy, contraction, and breathless elevation of the spirit is the loudest voice the modern world will every hear. In the mire of convenience and the servitude of the conveyer belt the most subversive act is to simply say no, to claim your birthright as a warrior, embrace the kindred soul, and blaze a path of pure fortitude in a direction no one else understands. If someone else like you exists then why not join forces? Why not create a fraternity? Why not create a congress? A brotherhood? A gang, a club, a mobilization of forces? An alliance? A clique, a mob if necessary? Why not take advantage of the synergism that exists between like minds? Our concept of fitness is the bridge that brings like-minded warrior souls together. The day escapes those who wait. The time to act, to succeed, to conquer, and subdue the elusive prize of self-actualization is now. Rest or rust?

135# thrusters x 10
pull ups x 15
push ups x 20
sit ups x 25
rest 2 min
repeat
rest 5 min
135# power cleans x 10
pull ups x 15
push ups x 20
sit ups x 25
rest 2 min
repeat
rest 5 min
final set
135# sumo d-lift hi pulls x 10
burpees x 15
sit ups x 20

dbl unders x 100
hspu x 5
caving ladder climb
dbl unders x 80
hspu x 5
caving ladder climb
dbl unders x 60
hspu x 5
caving ladder climb
dbl unders x 40
hspu x 5
caving ladder climb
dbl unders x 20
hspu x 5
caving ladder climb

REST

shoulder press
8-8-8
hi-bar squat box jumps
5-5-5-5
45# bar squat jumps
max reps in 3 min
10# tabata bar hangs

snatch practice
1-1-1-1-1
d-lift 2x bdy wt/muscle ups
5/5, 4/4, 3/3, 2/2, 1/1,
for time

150# fat bar bench press x 9

135# hang power cleans x 6

L-pull ups x 3

10 rnds for time

Learn to appreciate the elements.

"THE GYM CLOSED AT THREE"

Ergo; an unscheduled rest day.

LEBANON, NEW HAMPSHIRE

front squats
@ 80% 1rm
1-1-1-1
...
power clean and jerk
@ 80% 1rm
1-1-1-1
...
15# weighted pull ups x 50
for time

This gym has balls.

REST

THE ANSWER IS NOT IN THE INDUSTRY
The only way to cast your vote against a profit driven industry is to outsmart them. The industry is founded on the premise of profit and not providing the athlete (or consumer) with the best possible solution to his problem, in this case replenishing an exercise induced defecit. Why is Gatorade so popular? The answer is marketing. Most of what we think we know is not from reading valid academic sources such as peer reviewed journals or conducting experiments in our own laboratories. It simply comes from marketing, word of mouth, or old wives tales. The industry takes part of the truth, exploits it in the form of marketing, and vuala! One, then another, and another ad infinitum until the present cornucopia of worthless sports drinks exist. I find it amazing that the best sports drink comes with no processing, marketing, or lab intesive research. Rather, it comes straight from nature in the form of coconut water. The industry has gotten wind of this and, since it can so easily be marketed as a sports or health drink, beefed up the price in order to increase its profit margin (basic supply and demand). Since I'm smarter than them I decided to look outside the industry for the same product that wasn't marketed as a sports drink and sure enough found it at almost half the price. The Goya brand is marketed as coconut water whereas ZICO is twice the price because they've used a fitness model in a yoga pose on their website. This is a true indicator of exclusivity. O.N.E. and Vita Coco are also more expensive because of the trendy packaging and target audience marketing. When looking for something specific the industry is probably the last place you want to look. Don't be fooled by someone trying to fool you.

THE MODIFIED LUMBERJACK

275# d-lift x 20
100# sandbag carry 100mtrs
97# R k-bell swings x 20
sandbag carry
115# OH squats x 20
sandbag carry
burpees x 20
sandbag carry
pull ups C2B x 20
sandbag carry
box jumps 24" x 20
sandbag carry
45# d-bell squat cleans x 20

BJJ

100# sandbag cleans x 7
ring push ups x 7
7 rnds
rest 5 min
135# SDLHP x 7
back extensions x 7
ghd sit ups x 7
7 rnds

BJJ

read this

100mtr farmers carry (96/85# logs)

100mtr sprint

5 rnds for time

rest 3

95# tabata push press

rest intervals hanging from the pull up bar

rest

16# ball slams x 12

100 mtr sprint

5 rnds for time

snatch practice
45, 65, 95, 115, 135#
1-1-1 per weight
back squats
135, 225, 275, 315, 335# x 3
power jumps
1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1